01
Oct

Red October

This October, I think I’m seeing red. Nope, I’m not angry. I mean, RED in its positive denotations such as good luck, joy, courage, love, celebration, and prosperity.

Despite the tragic events that happened recently around us courtesy of Typhoon Ondoy, I see some good things coming out of them like kindness, unity, generosity, and selflessness. In the same manner in my personal circumstance, I see beginnings in endings. I see hellos in goodbyes. I see a new life in death.

Days from now, I am getting a year older. And I am hoping to get my wish this time of celebrating my red-letter day without any tinge of war, tragedy, or anger.  After all, who says that I can’t celebrate Christmas or Valentine’s Day in October?

25
Sep

Independence Day

Today is my self-declared Independence Day.

At last, I have freed myself from my long-time foolishness–or may I say stubbornness–of waiting for someone to prove once and for all that he was worth the wait. Unfortunately, things turned out differently from what I have expected.

It was indeed a blessing in disguise that we were not even “official”. I already had my reservations and doubts when we’ve finally opened our lines of communication again. But I still gave the situation the chance to prosper for whatever it is worth due to my strong faith on some matters that my gut feel has been telling me about. When things that I wasn’t expecting at all eventually happened, however, that sealed the case.

I find it so funny that after all these years, nothing much has changed, really. It looked like fate has intervened again in my favor. Too good I didn’t take the bait at once with all those exchanged repronouncements of love. I’ve been there and I knew how it felt like to be walking on egg shells just because I didn’t know exactly where I stood.

Thus, I am choosing to do the right thing and stand my ground despite his seeming goodness in mind, heart, and character. In the end, I know I’ll still be proven right for not going for it. Not yet, not at this time. Despite the hurt, I am still glad that the truth has finally set me free! Love is not always sweeter the second time around but as the cliche goes, having loved and lost is far better than not having loved at all.

Now, I’d rather wear my heart on my sleeve than keep it bottled up in a sea of deep sadness and regret. After all, I still believe in love and forever.

23
Sep

Pissed Off

When we are angry, more often than not, we say or do things that we don’t really mean. We are actually at our “worst” when our whole being is enveloped by raging nerves and hormones that scream “a#s%s^h&o*l@e#!”

Ever since the world began, I have experienced being at my angriest self only thrice. The first one was a result of a three-year pagtitimpi and pagpapasensiya. The second, I literally saw stars and experienced pagdidilim ng paningin due to a remark made by someone who has no right at all to judge me just like that. The third, my anger stemmed from a series of ginagawa-akong-tanga habit of someone who seemed to have forgotten the fact that papunta pa lang siya, pabalik na ako.

In those three instances, I did some things in retaliation that were quite childish and stupid. But one thing I could say is that I don’t regret everything I said or did under such circumstances lalo na ‘pag alam kong wala naman akong kasalanan. Normally, I am not a proud person. But once a person hits my most sensitive nerve which I think I don’t deserve, hell will break loose. I am very patient pero ‘pag naubos ang pasensiya ko, expect the worst. Kahit sino naman siguro, gano’n din.

Sorry for the outburst, tao lang.
08
Sep

Happy Birthday!

Today marks the birthdays of three special persons in my life–Mama Mary, DAGirl, and a good friend.  

I first met Mama Mary when I was in kindergarten. An aunt used to gather us little kids around her and teach us how to pray the rosary in honor of the Blessed Virgin Mary.  In high school, we also prayed the Holy Rosary every after flag ceremony so it became a habit harder to break for some of us who has believed in her.  Yes, she is truly our Mother who helps us receive more blessings and answered prayers.

DAGirl is something that makes me proud since I acquired her in 2006.  Spending three years with her is one of the most fulfilling moments I had in life so far.  Why because she is the product of my hard work, inspiration, and deep passion for anything vintage.  Every time I look at her, I couldn’t help but smile because she always reminds me of good and sweet memories. I will never ever trade her for anything else.

The third one is a good friend I’ve known for years already.  He has been an epitome of what intelligence and quiet confidence are all about.  He has gained my admiration and respect for being so down-to-earth and low profile despite his major accomplishments in life. I feel so blessed for having him as one of my closest friends ever since with whom I can always be myself–no questions asked.

To all of you, happy birthday! May we have more several years of love and friendship together. Cheers!

02
Aug

What ‘Cory Aquino’ Means to Me

Back in February 1986, I couldn’t comprehend yet what EDSA People Power was all about.  All I knew then was that the widow of Ninoy Aquino, who gave up his life for the Filipinos, was going to be the first woman president of the Philippines. 

So much has been said already about President Cory since she passed away yesterday.  Out of respect, we Filipinos have this habit of saying good things about a person once he or she is dead.  In Mrs. Aquino’s case, however, the people are saying good things about her not because she’s dead, but because she truly deserved all the accolades, praises, and tributes being thrown her way–before and after death. She may not be the best president we ever had but she was a good living example of what sacrifice, strength, and selflessness are all about. 

Cory Aquino is dead but her legacy in restoring democracy in the Philippines will go down in political history as the most remarkable feat of all.  Goodbye and thank you, Madam Cory.  I am so sure that God is smiling at you now for a job well done… and a life well lived.

27
Jul

Sad Ending

Have you read the story I posted below? It finally got its end–a sad one. No more second chances, no more what-ifs.  I really sympathize with the characters because they are all my friends, my very good friends who could have lived happier together had fate intervened eight years ago.

That’s life. You win some, you lose some.

17
Jul

A Love Story

Twenty-one years ago, Josh declared his love for Claire who was then the object of his affection for three long years.  They were so young then, still reeling from the remnants of their childhood that Claire was very scared she could not keep up with the demands of a teenage relationship so she readily brushed Josh aside. Josh was so hurt but despite the seeming competition with other guys in winning Claire’s heart, he pursued her just the same, but to no avail for other reasons that Claire kept only to herself.

They went on their separate ways and Josh eventually succeeded in fulfilling his ambition of becoming an engineer.  Through those years that they were apart,  Josh held on to his feelings for Claire.  After eleven years, thinking that he was ready again to face her–now more accomplished and more mature–he sought the help of their long-time common friend Ehra to look for Claire.  Josh and Ehra figuratively moved heaven and earth just to find her. Unfortunately, they never did. 

Until one day, Ehra gave up and told Josh to just move on, forget Claire, and get a life.  Sensing the futility of their search, he finally relented and opened his heart for another girl. In 2001, he married Jen–still hoping at the last minute, though, that somehow Claire would still show up.  But no Claire came.  Ehra, who helped Josh with all the wedding preparations, decided not to attend the wedding because she was likewise hurting. She also didn’t want to hurt Josh more because somehow, everytime Josh sees her, he was being reminded of Claire.  Ehra never met the new girl in Josh’s life and after the wedding, they never saw each other again.     

Now, after twenty years, Ehra and Claire accidentally saw each other.  Ehra was taking a three-week break from her job in Hongkong when she saw Claire at a mall.  Ehra told her what happened and after hearing the whole story, Claire was in tears.  Why, because she was also looking for Josh at that time. After going through so much great pain, anguish, and sufferings in what could be the lowest moment in her life, only a good man who has loved her to pieces could have been the only reason then for her to believe that life is still fair.

She believed that among all the guys who were trying to enter her world ever since, Josh had the sincerest love and purest intentions. She just wanted to finally return the feelings not because she needed him but because she finally realized that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. In short, yes, she has also loved him all this time and made the resolve to take the initiative to find him because if parental disobedience was not an issue twenty years ago, Josh could have been her first and last boyfriend.

HOW SAD.

Will love lead them back to each other’s arms?  Or everything is now too late for another chance?  The answer may be bleak for now but who knows, things will still fall into place once the universe conspires to make their paths cross again.

To be continued.

06
Jul

Senti Queen Turns One Year Old!

Today, July 6, this blog is now a year old.  Ang bilis ng panahon!  To those hearts I have touched, my pleasure. To those minds I may have disturbed, my apologies.

Most importantly, to those who have inspired and encouraged me to keep on writing, my sincerest gratitude!  Cheers!!!

22
Jun

Word of Honor

In the movie “It Could Happen to You” which I watched last night on Q, Charlie meets a waitress named Yvonne who waits on him at a diner.  Charlie doesn’t have enough money that day to pay the tip so instead, he promises to split with her his prospective lottery winnings.  Charlie eventually wins $4 million in the lottery and to Yvonne’s great surprise, he keeps his promise and gives her $2M!  She thinks that he is out of his mind to do that but Charlie insists, “A promise is a promise.”  Too good to be true but the story is based on an actual event.

If that happens to me, I would probably do the same thing.  I may not have kept some promises in the past but in major commitments such as that, not keeping one’s word is somewhat nakaka-konsensiya.  After all, winning the lottery is just an added bonus in life.  Blessings are meant to be shared and promises, kept–especially if you know in your heart that you may not just be saving a face but someone’s life as well.

Respect and honor is definitely greater than $2M.  If one wants the money all by himself, however, simple lang naman eh:  Do not commit if you’re half-hearted or do not make a promise if you can’t fulfill it.  Because once you’ve given your word, much is already expected.  Saka di ba, “losers make promises they often break; winners make commitments they always keep.”   I assume nobody wants to be called a loser.

20
Jun

More Than Words

I was browsing the other day the Comelec-backed PoliticalArena.com website, an election portal designed to be a “socio-political networking site” that will link all candidates to their respective supporters.  It features all decided and undecided presidential and vice presidential aspirants and so far, there are 22 of them!  I find the number amusing and at the same time, irritating.

I have watched the two ANC Countdown to 2010: Leadership Forums shown over ABS-CBN a few Sundays ago and I was not impressed with most of the presidential hopefuls.  Based on their answers, only three of them gave sensible and honest assessments on the various issues tackled.  The rest, they were just either trying to look endearing by being funny, trying to sound intellectual by giving statistics, trying to look heroic by citing past achievements, or just this: simply trying hard.    

While there are candidates who are very qualified to lead this country, what we need is a man of action with untarnished reputation and strong political will to do what is legal, just, and ethical.  More than words is all what we Filipinos need to see and consider before casting our votes in 2010.