Archive for September, 2009

25
Sep

Independence Day

Today is my self-declared Independence Day.

At last, I have freed myself from my long-time foolishness–or may I say stubbornness–of waiting for someone to prove once and for all that he was worth the wait. Unfortunately, things turned out differently from what I have expected.

It was indeed a blessing in disguise that we were not even “official”. I already had my reservations and doubts when we’ve finally opened our lines of communication again. But I still gave the situation the chance to prosper for whatever it is worth due to my strong faith on some matters that my gut feel has been telling me about. When things that I wasn’t expecting at all eventually happened, however, that sealed the case.

I find it so funny that after all these years, nothing much has changed, really. It looked like fate has intervened again in my favor. Too good I didn’t take the bait at once with all those exchanged repronouncements of love. I’ve been there and I knew how it felt like to be walking on egg shells just because I didn’t know exactly where I stood.

Thus, I am choosing to do the right thing and stand my ground despite his seeming goodness in mind, heart, and character. In the end, I know I’ll still be proven right for not going for it. Not yet, not at this time. Despite the hurt, I am still glad that the truth has finally set me free! Love is not always sweeter the second time around but as the cliche goes, having loved and lost is far better than not having loved at all.

Now, I’d rather wear my heart on my sleeve than keep it bottled up in a sea of deep sadness and regret. After all, I still believe in love and forever.

23
Sep

Pissed Off

When we are angry, more often than not, we say or do things that we don’t really mean. We are actually at our “worst” when our whole being is enveloped by raging nerves and hormones that scream “a#s%s^h&o*l@e#!”

Ever since the world began, I have experienced being at my angriest self only thrice. The first one was a result of a three-year pagtitimpi and pagpapasensiya. The second, I literally saw stars and experienced pagdidilim ng paningin due to a remark made by someone who has no right at all to judge me just like that. The third, my anger stemmed from a series of ginagawa-akong-tanga habit of someone who seemed to have forgotten the fact that papunta pa lang siya, pabalik na ako.

In those three instances, I did some things in retaliation that were quite childish and stupid. But one thing I could say is that I don’t regret everything I said or did under such circumstances lalo na ‘pag alam kong wala naman akong kasalanan. Normally, I am not a proud person. But once a person hits my most sensitive nerve which I think I don’t deserve, hell will break loose. I am very patient pero ‘pag naubos ang pasensiya ko, expect the worst. Kahit sino naman siguro, gano’n din.

Sorry for the outburst, tao lang.
08
Sep

Happy Birthday!

Today marks the birthdays of three special persons in my life–Mama Mary, DAGirl, and a good friend.  

I first met Mama Mary when I was in kindergarten. An aunt used to gather us little kids around her and teach us how to pray the rosary in honor of the Blessed Virgin Mary.  In high school, we also prayed the Holy Rosary every after flag ceremony so it became a habit harder to break for some of us who has believed in her.  Yes, she is truly our Mother who helps us receive more blessings and answered prayers.

DAGirl is something that makes me proud since I acquired her in 2006.  Spending three years with her is one of the most fulfilling moments I had in life so far.  Why because she is the product of my hard work, inspiration, and deep passion for anything vintage.  Every time I look at her, I couldn’t help but smile because she always reminds me of good and sweet memories. I will never ever trade her for anything else.

The third one is a good friend I’ve known for years already.  He has been an epitome of what intelligence and quiet confidence are all about.  He has gained my admiration and respect for being so down-to-earth and low profile despite his major accomplishments in life. I feel so blessed for having him as one of my closest friends ever since with whom I can always be myself–no questions asked.

To all of you, happy birthday! May we have more several years of love and friendship together. Cheers!